There were many years when I could not escape the tensions that winter holidays invite, but no more. By steady degrees, I’ve enjoyed an increasing distance from holiday stresses and wouldn’t want to have them back.

I don’t think there is a single beautiful thing on the planet that does not have it’s counter force attempting to  dismantle or deenergize it. There is no reason to buy into any of that, but the temptations are planted all along the merry way.

I call the results of their influence “gratuitous stress”.

My ways of addressing the threat will not meet with approval everywhere, but I’ve learned that the same can be said for every possible approach to every possible scenario.

One bait of peril that I’ve reigned in involves gift giving, which is a perilous venture because it’s so nice to be favored with a sincerely offered present but potentially disheartening to be passed over.

I’ve learned to be generous as a rule while seriously limiting holiday gifting. When it’s well known that only the grand children will get gifts, and those come up to a week late (but well considered), feelings aren’t hurt. That range of beneficiaries is sensible and easy to understand.

If, on the other hand, I felt inclined to get a little something for others, then the trouble could begin. Where would I stop? With who? what would be the criteria? Shouldn’t a card be written and the gift be wrapped  and the substance of the offering equal to the wonderousness of the recipient? Yes. But someone right handed would get a left handed gift. Someone on special diet would get what “you know I can’t eat!” and something would be the wrong color or the fourth one they were given this year. Finding that the dollar value was low or high or questionable would be analyzed to be a message all it’s own.

My solution is to save gifts for the rest of the year if I’m inclined to give them. 

This year I kept with the usual ratio, about half the cards I wrote never got mailed or delivered. But I did make some. I like the effect of this design. I printed little photos of a painting and a cartoon and glued them to black foamboard. then I wrote on the foam board in metalic pencil.

Then, there are the decorations:

The same tiny nativity is on the back of the stove year around.

My tree is still in the attic, laden with ornaments from when the kids were here.

Though I am a fan of the colored lights, I haven’t put any up yet. Historically I’ve hung many strands around the patio and kept them on the rest of the year until most of them have burned out. Or I’ve wrapped them around the pillar by the front entry as a beacon of beautiful white, magenta, and blue. But this year I’ve forgotten. Happily, there are still a few days. or hours.

I love this time of year. While people are out there lavishing each other and creating a magical bubble of joy, I’m here at home at peace and very happily engaged in what I love doing.

Personally, I enjoy friends and family just the way they come naturally and I feel content to stay home during the holidays. Every now and again I venture out and accept the seasonal invitations though.

This year, I got a few cards from stalwarts who have long favored me with their card or photo or annual family report, and I eagerly opened the envelopes to see.

Warm smiles : )

Christmas is a great season and a wonderful holiday and I enjoy it as much as ever, especially now that it’s free of those pesky stressors. I have great family, the best friendships, and peace.

So if you didn’t get a present from me, you probably aren’t my grandchild or if you are, it’s coming. If you didn’t get a card, niether did anyone else except a few to whom I could hand deliver (which eliminates the postage dynamics).

It’s no reflection on our friendship, but just a nice casual paced approach to the festive season from someone who’s seen the frenzied side of it and prefers to leave that experience to the professionals.